DIY landscaping nourishes the neurodivergent soul like nothing else can. Read on for five life-transforming lessons I learned by doing my own landscaping.
The story.
A warm breeze tickled my face as I thrust the spade into the earth. The aroma of dirt teased my nose as I plopped the dirt to the side, then dug in again.
When the hole was deep and wide enough, I picked up the pot with the lemon balm, turned it upside down, and caught the plant as the compacted potting mix slid out. With care, I settled the contents of the small, plastic pot into the hole, then packed soil around it.
I rocked back on my heels, smiling. Looked around at the other plants I’d put in the ground, the paving stones my husband had installed in our front yard after digging out all the grass.
I’d designed and created a garden, with only the help of a few books on gardening and landscaping. Pride, satisfaction, and joy burst within me.
DIY landscaping: a lovely part of frugal homemaking for the neurodivergent brain.
I understand that not every autistic woman or woman with ADHD is going to have the mental space to do her own landscaping. Bu the goal of this blog is to help neurodivergent women to live as simply as possible so as to reduce stress and find fulfillment. As a big part of stress reduction is living beneath one’s means, I want to explore how to save money in all aspects of living.
When you landscape your yard yourself, saving money is the biggest obvious benefit – assuming you do it correctly. But for neurodivergent women, especially those over the age of forty-five, the reasons to engage in DIY landscaping are much more profound.
Here’s what I’ve learned.
#1: DIY landscaping makes for a fascinating autistic special interest.
My introductory story described the time when family was still living in the suburbs and I’d come to despise the boring grassy yard. It was a small space, and didn’t take a lot of study to figure out what plants would work and how to maintain them.
On the other hand, the area in front of our house on the rural property where we now reside has taken a lot of experimentation, thought, and research. And, of course, more work. Did you know that there are a lot of beautiful flowers and small shrubs that neither rabbits nor deer will touch with a ten foot pole? (If they could carry a pole.) Did you know you could purchase packets with flower or meadow seed mixes specifically designed for the region of the country in which you live?
From amending soil to deciding on the plants, learning how to landscape is fulfilling work for the autistic brain. It’s great for the ADHD brain, too, because it’s a short-term project that gets your mind and body fully involved.
#2: DIY landscaping brings meaning and purpose to life.
This lesson is especially important for women over the age of forty-five. Dropping levels of estrogen mess up our brain chemistry, making us not only tired, but also grasping for the sense of purpose in life that used to spring inside of us when we got out of bed every morning.
Working with the soil, nourishing the life of plants, helps us to feel we’re a part of something big and important again.
#3: DIY landscaping forces us outside.
Most neurodivergent women crave being outside. The energy from nature feeds our souls. Its magnetic force, beauty, and calm ambiance soothe our frazzled nerves and spinning minds.
But between work, the demands of the household, and the temptation of technology, we often struggle to go outdoors. We know it’s what we need, but there’s too much else to do.
When you are in charge of your own landscaping, taking care of the plants and soil becomes part of the “to do.” You now have a compelling reason to go outside, so you do.
#4: DIY landscaping brings out your creativity.
Neurodivergent women need to be creative. It’s a way both of stimming and expressing our unique selves to the world. But as with getting outside, life often makes that difficult. When you determine to beautify your property yourself, however, you get to play with which colors, textures, and sizes go well together and make you feel happy. And changing your mind later costs you no more than a few new plants, or the work of transferring existing plants elsewhere.
To landscape your own yard is to gain the same satisfaction as an artist or composer when they have completed a work.
#5: DIY landscaping teaches you important life lessons.
Like any kind of gardening, landscaping teaches you patience, problem solving, the ingredients necessary for a thriving life (think of all the possible metaphors around water, soil, and fertilizer), nurturing, giving, and unconditional love.
They are lessons that can help regulate your emotions and perspective when things go sideways.
Ready to go on this beautiful journey?
When we neurodivergent women take on the task of landscaping our own outside space, rather than delegating it to strangers, it transforms our lives in ways we can’t imagine when we first set out to do it.
Even if all you can do is set out a few pots on an apartment balcony.
I invite you to embark on this particular journey. When you do, it will quickly become an integral part of the slower, simpler, gentler way of life that you need in order to thrive.
